A Woman’s Smile

Whenever I see a woman smile, I thank the reason behind it. The world is definitely male-dominated. Opportunities seldom come a woman’s way. She has to squeeze through the crowd and grab it. I recently joined a permanent job after a four year break. Trust me, I know what I am talking about. And when it is India you are born in, there is even lesser reason to smile.

For a long time I used to think that when my generation becomes adult, there will be no more female foeticides and infanticides, grooms will start refusing dowry and being a house husband won’t rob a man of his dignity. Then I became an adult and I met mothers my age who started collecting gold for their daughter’s wedding almost as soon as she was born. A friend of mine looks forward to fifty tolas of gold and the Ford Escourt that his would-be wife is going to bring him. The number of cases in female foeticide and infanticide are still rising. And every woman I know has to go home and cook after work.

A girl child starts fighting her battle as soon as she is allowed to be born. Most parents don’t celebrate a girl’s birth in India. Having thus entered the world unwanted, she grows up being denied opportunities. “You can’t play football, you are a girl.” “Don’t wear jeans.” “Eat like a girl.” I had a friend in sixth standard who was visibly thinner than us. She was the youngest among four sisters and one brother. Her brother’s food was cooked separately, with more ghee, fresher ingredients and definitely more love. No wonder by the time my friend was in college she became adept in using the wiles and charms of her sex to get things done her way. People called her a bitch for using PMS to get leaves approved and flirting with her boss for promotions, but these were the only ways she knew to get ahead in life.

Women from all walks of life are struggling; whether it’s the millionaire’s wife striving to create her own identity, or the down trodden illiterate one who is somehow managing five kids, a drunk and abusive husband and a manual job way beyond her capability. Thus, whatever the reason behind a woman’s smile; whether it’s her new shoes, a compliment from her beau, or her child’s first word, I thank every inch of it.

She can smile through fire

And burn through ice

To hold her head high

She can wield her might